It’s that special time of the year when we get to celebrate the incredible LGBTQIA+ community all month long. We want to celebrate this remarkable community by elevating voices, along with hearing advice and stories from a few of our favorite people. Makeup and beauty opens a space where everyone is able to express themselves, their art, and be 100% authentic to themselves. We want to commemorate Pride Month by donating 10% of Pseudo Labs proceeds to The Trevor Project during the entire month of June. We were able to talk to Kyle Muff and Devaney Sparrow to hear their take on the importance of self-expression, navigating identity, and their coming out stories.
Meet Kyle Muff
In Pseudo: How are you holding up with everything going on in the world right now?
Kyle Muff: I am doing alright. I have been finding things to entertain/distract myself, mainly my houseplants. My creative outlet for a while was my makeup and doing looks, but recently I’ve been struggling a lot with my mental health and haven’t been very active in creating. I feel most like myself when I'm taking care of my plants. Honestly, always surrounding myself with them.
IP: What gives you the courage to become confident in yourself and your identity?
KM: This is honestly something I still struggle with every day. It has taken a long time to get to this point and I honestly have makeup to thank for it. I feel most confident in my identity when I’m with my friends who truly accept me for who I am.
IP: Do you have a coming-out story and want to share it?
KM: My coming-out story is honestly kind of lame. I was dating a guy and wasn’t out to my family yet, my mom was very pushy and didn’t respect my privacy and basically pulled it out of me over text and that’s when I came out to her…over text. It really sucked that I couldn’t do it on my own terms, but I am very thankful that my family is supportive.
IP: What advice do you have for your younger self, and others beginning their coming out process?
KM: For my younger self would say, don’t be afraid to be yourself and don’t wait so long to come out to your family. You are not alone! If your family is not supportive there are so many people out here who will be there for you. Being gay we can choose our family, and there will always be someone there for you.
IP: What are some ways you practice kindness to yourself?
KM: I like to practice kindness to myself by just taking time for myself. Doing that extra skincare step, or sleeping in a bit more than usual.
IP: Who is your biggest inspiration? What or who gave you the most hope for the future?
KM: My biggest inspiration would really just be anyone out there being their true authentic self. I find a lot of inspiration from drag queens and love their confidence. This is a really hard question. I don’t know if I see much hope for the future in the current climate and how things are going.
Meet Devaney Sparrow
In Pseudo: How are you holding up with everything going on in the world right now?
DS: Mentally, I’m in a place that seems so contradictory but also makes so much sense. On one hand, sometimes it feels like I don’t always know which way is up. Being in this sort of limbo, because of the state of the world, has been super difficult and confusing. But on the other hand, with spending so much time alone during this pandemic, I’ve gotten to know myself in an incredibly deep way. I’ve explored sides of myself I never even thought I needed to. I’m so grateful for that.
IP: What is your creative outlet?
DS: I’m a very creative person and so really any medium of art I love participating in. Painting, singing in the shower, losing myself in a book, all of it! But dancing alone in my room by far takes the cake. It is hands down my favorite thing to do.
IP: When do you feel most like yourself?
DS: I feel the most me when I’m alone. Either when I’m spending time with myself in nature or when I’m home alone drinking red wine and cooking pasta while I dance to my favorite music.
IP: What gives you the courage to become confident in yourself and your identity?
DS: I feel like along the way I got so much support and encouragement from the people that love me, and it’s so important to appreciate that. In all honesty, though I only became confident when I started actively unpacking all of the things that made me insecure. Embracing body neutrality and my queerness while I de-centered the male gaze from my life was instrumental. I feel most confident in my identity when I’m around other queer people. Whether it’s my queer friends or just being in LGBTQ+ spaces.
IP: Do you have a coming-out story and want to share it?
DS: I don’t have some epic coming out story, to be honest. I have a lot of privilege in that regard. My parents had to come a long way when it came to understanding the complexities of my gender and sexuality, but they were still incredibly supportive and I’m so very grateful for that. I basically just slowly started to say things here and there that allowed them to put two and two together.
IP: What advice do you have for your younger self?
DS: Making yourself small around other people who are afraid of all that you are isn’t noble or being a good person. It will only destroy the most beautiful parts of you. Figure out who you actually are and not who you can be for others. If people cannot digest you then let them choke.
IP: What advice do you have for others beginning their coming out process?
DS: The biggest thing I wish someone had told me is that you don’t owe anyone any explanation when it comes to who you are or who you love. If you want to come out to the world, do that. If you want to come out to only your loved ones, absolutely! But please know that nobody is entitled to have an opinion on your gender or sexuality. Your health and safety are more important than anything else.
IP: What are some ways you practice kindness to yourself?
DS: I am constantly practicing being patient and compassionate with myself. Specifically by holding space for me to be imperfect. Doing things that maybe I don’t want to do at that moment but I still do because I know it’ll make me happier. Such as cooking my favorite meal instead of ordering takeout or cleaning my room. And sometimes it looks like putting everything on pause so I can cuddle my dog and watch tv.
IP: Who is your biggest inspiration? What or who gave you the most hope for the future?
DS: My biggest inspiration is myself. What gives me hope is seeing queer kids much younger than me standing so firm in who they are. Being so authentically themselves and doing it so much younger than I did. I’m so proud of them and it gives me so much hope knowing my generation and the younger ones will genuinely change the way the world works.
Resources from The Trevor Project
Trevor Lifeline, 24/7 Crisis intervention and suicide prevention phone line: 1-866-488-7386
Confidential texting with a counselor: Text START to 678-678
Confidential online instant messaging with a counselor, here.